Because life doesn’t come with an instruction manual — and if it did, men wouldn’t read it anyway — we present Three Steps, an occasional series of how-to illustrations to help you manage challenging situations with aplomb.
Chicago, like a ’90s one-hit wonder, is all ice, ice baby.
Hanging from your eaves. Freezing your beard. And — most menacingly — black and slick underfoot.
Built to spill, these streets are.
Thusly, to save your caboose from an untimely sprawl, we present a serious piece of lifestyle journalism we call How Not To Fall On Your Ass This Winter.
Now that you know, two more quick PSAs:
First, buy the right boots.
You may remember our winter boot guide. Use it.
Secondly, be a good neighbor and salt your sidewalks.
If you’re safe, we’re all safe.
Or at least upright.
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