Pack Your Bags. This Can’t Wait.

Sleeping on the shoulder of Highway 37 in the front seat of a rental car: done it.

Calistoga, our preferred destination for last-minute weekends away, is somehow always farther than we thought.

So lately we’ve been cutting off our trip a little earlier — at Yountville.

Specifically, at the Bardessono, quite possibly the most beautiful hotel in the region, which, given the coordinates, puts in the running for most beautiful hotel in the lower 48.

Here’s how you do it.

Call ahead. In fact, call them right now: 707-204-6050.

Tell them you want to schedule a vinotherapy massage in your Spa Suite, with its iPad, Egyptian cotton sheets (swear: this makes a difference) and complimentary bike usage for touring the surrounding vineyards.

They’re Mozies, so you’re definitely going to want to take them home.

You know those bikes you see the locals riding in Amsterdam? Smart and sexy as all get out? These are inspired by those. With the added bonus of hand-tooled Buck & Wing leather accessories.

Honestly: email us. We’ll make the reservation for you. Well, we’ll do what we can up to the point where someone needs your credit card number.

This is a public service.

Life is too short to go through it with tight shoulders.

You probably have a better half who’d forget all transgressions you commit for, like, at least a fortnight if you treated her to a weekend away. With you, a pair of bikes, and no phone.

Make the call, friend.