Because I watch more movie trailers than is reasonable for any one human being, we decided that each Friday I should bring you a smattering of the week’s best (and occasionally worst) with a little color commentary on each. I call it Danny’s Trailer Park, and it’s a great way to kill 10 minutes you probably weren’t doing anything too productive with anyway. Enjoy.
If You’re Into … Dramatic Political Vibes Based on a True Story
A Private War
The Gist: Rosamund Pike (who caught an Academy nod for her chilling performance in Gone Girl) plays embattled, eyepatch-sportin’ Sunday British Times correspondent Marie Colvin, who risked life and limb (and sanity) to cover some of the most war-torn areas of the world until her tragic death in Syria in 2012.
The Assessment: The source material is rock solid and anyone who’s seen Cartel Land knows that director Matthew Heineman brings it on the conflict tip. Plus I’d bet a hundred bucks that Pike goes from “Oscar nominee” to “Oscar winner” on this one.
The Front Runner
The Gist: Hugh Jackman as 1988 presidential candidate Gary Hart, whose campaign collapsed after allegations of an extramarital affair surfaced.
The Assessment: Jason Reitman (Up in the Air, Thank You For Smoking) at the helm + heavy ‘80s feels + a bananas supporting cast = a winner in my book. Also, remember when this sort of thing actually prevented someone from becoming president? Sigh.
If You’re Into … Big Budget Sci-Fi Ridiculousness That You’ll Probably Still Like Because You’re a Child of the ‘80s
The Predator
The Gist: The titular alien hunting machines are back again, this time going up against a ragtag group of disgraced ex-elite soldiers + Olivia Munn.
The Assessment: “They’re strong! They’re fast! And f*cking you up is their idea of tourism!” Looks like director Shane Black (Lethal Weapon, Iron Man 3, The Nice Guys) and Co. are really swinging for the campy fences on this thing and I am very here for it.
If You’re Into … Being Super Creeped Out Slash Utterly Terrified to the Point of Paralysis Even
I Think We’re Alone Now
The Gist: Peter Dinklage is alone in his tiny post-apocalyptic hometown until Elle Fanning shows up and things get … complicated?
The Assessment: This is my favorite kind of trailer because it gives you the deeply unsettling vibe of the film without giving too much away. And you gotta think Handmaid’s Tale director Reed Morano has had plenty of practice with deeply unsettling.
Suspiria
The Gist: The much-anticipated remake of Dario Argento’s 1977 horror classic from director Luca Guagadino (Call Me By Your Name), that finds novice ballet student Dakota Johnson at a prestigious dance academy in Germany where shit a lot more sinister than arabesques is going down.
The Assessment: I mean … if the way I feel after watching the trailer for this film is any indication, the full product may very well send me to an asylum.
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